Morning campers! This match report is brought to you from my caravan in sunny Selsey. And much like a bank holiday trip to the beach, Saturday’s match was a long, hot journey to get to a remote location for an enjoyable if ultimately disappointing day out.

The day had got off to a promising start - Sadda, fresh from his 6 wickets in his trusty trainers, was presented with his own pair of spikes. Imagine, if you will, Dorothy in the Wizard of Oz being presented with the ruby slippers; wide-eyed Sadda clung them to his chest, before putting them on and clicking his heels together ‘I will get another fifer, I will get another fifer’.

Much like the intrepid gang who set off down the Yellow Brick Road, we were all looking for our individual things that we lacked. ‘If I could only get a wicket’ thought Guy. ‘If I could only stop mentioning fantasy points during a match’ thought Stefan. ‘If I could only have some trainers’ thought yours truly - as I was doing my best impression of Zola Budd (one for the teenagers - ask your parents) in the warm-up having forgotten my footwear.

None of this was going to stop us though - not even el Capitano, Jedders, losing his first toss of the season. Don’t worry though folks, Jedders was quick to reason that he wanted to field first anyways; which would have been more convincing had it not been the hottest day of the year so far!

It was a tricky start as their openers got into their rhythm. Dave and Guy plugged away at the beginning, but couldn’t quite get the breakthrough. So it was time to throw the ball to Sadda, who gave the opening bat a tempter which he hooked to Andy deep on the boundary just before his 50. As catches go, it was impressive - but not as impressive as the catch we were about to witness…

Back in the day Nike made a football advert which featured the Brazil football team juggling a football through an airport terminal, passing it from person to person. Well in much the same display of supreme athleticism, if Nike were to make a cricket advert this is probably what they’d show: A thick top edge off Jedders bowling, the ball somersaulting - looking destined for Jaco’s gloves. But no, he palms it on to Azeem at first slip, who pats it up into the air, not once, not twice, not thrice - enough times for us all to think he was taking the piss at this point. While we all stood, mesmerised by Azeem’s juggling display, Stefan could sniff the opportunity for some fantasy points - so he sprinted in from third man to dive through Azeem’s arms and to finally take the catch.

Having got out the openers, more wickets fell for Sadda and Jedders - a slight purple patch from their middle order got them some more runs before Bray were able to get the final few wickets - with even Guy getting in on the action - to wrap things up 235 ao.

Into bat we went - and it didn’t start well; Liam and I fell early, leaving the stage set for Andy and Azeem to put on a partnership. Andy did his best to try to get out before his fifty and his century - chipping catches left, right and centre that kept getting put down. It was difficult to tell who was more disappointed - him or the fielder. When he finally did fall for 108 in the last few overs - he was the image of Wizard of Oz’s Tin Man, creaking his way off the pitch to seek the lubrication of a well-earned pint.

Azeem batted admirably to just shy of his fifty - falling foul to a six attempt that resembles my approach to writing match-reports; a lot of ambition, but not enough substance.

A close run chase, but it was just a little too far for us to get - but lots of positives to take, and a good amount of bonus points taken too. We look instead to opportunities for next week and as Dorothy might say…”There’s no place like home!”